Give up?

It took me a long time. Well, at least two of them did. I got "Burp a gay sock" pretty quickly. It's "Pack your bag." For the other two, I had to get out Scrabble tiles with all the letters and rearrange them until I figured them out. After a while, I got the big one: "You can eat all the carbs you want." Wahoo! Since we've been doing the South Beach Diet, carbs are a rare and precious treat. I didn't get the third without Sammie's help. I would put letters together and he would tell me if they belonged together and if they made a whole word or only part of a word. Finally, though, I came up with "Wear something nice."

Of course, I promptly got mad at Sammie that the anagrams didn't have the answer. He rearranged some of the tiles for me to spell "Antrim." It's a bed and breakfast on the Pennsylvania/Maryland border (The Mason Dixon line) that we love! Sammie's so wonderful. How did I get so lucky?!?

By the way, it's now officially a year since we started this blog. I admit that I originally started it with other intentions. You see, it's also a year now since we started trying to have kids. I started a blog so we could easily give pregnancy/baby updates to family and friends. Instead, it's become a forum for what we do to make each other laugh. That's almost as fun...

Melba-

I have two presents for your birthday on Wednesday. Here is the first:

THOU CAN RALLY ANY TWO BEAT SAUCE

The second will still remain a surprise, but I offer the following two pieces of advice for you to most fully enjoy the present when I give it to you, which will be tomorrow afternoon.

BURP A GAY SOCK

and

ICE THE SNOW RAIN GEM

Love,
Sammie

PS – This idea came to me a couple of weeks ago while we were watching The Da Vinci Code…

(Everyone else – if you figure out what the messages are, please don’t post them here until AFTER her birthday…)

18 Ways To Be A Good Liberal

As many of you are already aware, something that you'll never have to worry about is my band ever falling victim to liberalism the way so many other bands seem to do. Saturday, I was reading aloud to the band the book 'Conservative Comebacks to Liberal Lies'. Did you know that the phrase 'Separation of Church and State' doesn't show up anywhere in the Constitution or Declaration of Independence? I didn't. Anyway, we had a good laugh reading it and later that night the singer forwarded to me a list of '18 Ways To Be A Good Liberal'. Melba and I got a big kick out of reading it so I thought I would post it here for all enjoy and/or despise.

1. You have to be against capital punishment, but support abortion on demand.

2. You have to believe that businesses create oppression and governments create prosperity.

3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding citizens are more of a threat than Nuclear weapons technology in the hands of Iran or Chinese and North Korean communists.

4. You have to believe that there was no art before federal funding

5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by cyclical changes in the earth's climate and more affected by soccer moms driving SUV's.

6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being homosexual is natural.

7. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of federal funding.

8. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th-graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids about sex.

9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but PETA activists do.

10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than actually doing something to earn it.

11. You have to believe that Mel Gibson spent $25 million of his own money to make "The Passion of the Christ" for financial gain only.

12 You have to believe NRA is bad because it supports certain parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports certain parts of the Constitution.

13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too high.

14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert E. Lee, and Thomas Edison.

15. You have to believe that standardized tests are Racist, but racial quotas and set-asides are not.

16. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked anywhere it's been tried is because the right people haven't been in charge.

17. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag queens and transvestites should be constitutionally protected, and manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal.

18. You have to believe that this message is a part of a vast, right-wing conspiracy.

This now makes for a whopping 1 1/2 posts this month because posting an email forward only counts as only 1/2 of a post. Still, that's more than we've done in past months. Comments are welcomed. Please post them on the blog for all to read...

And the winner is...

Decision time has come for grad school. Before announcing the winners, let’s first do a recap of the contestants and why we applied to each:

University of Texas:

• Ranked in the Top 20 MBA Schools by US News
• Excellent Alumni Network
• Close to two-fifths of the Markham Family
• Most graduates stay in the west/Mid-West Area (where we want to live)
• More job offers for Supply Chain students than there are Supply Chain students

Brigham Young University:

• Ranked in the Top 50 MBA Schools by US News
• Very low tuition rates
• Close to the Boyer Family
• Close to my parents
• Most graduates stay in the west/Mid-West Area

Penn State:

• I like their football team

So where are we going? C’mon – it should be obvious. My Dad didn’t raise a fool.

WE ARE – PENN STATE
WE ARE – PENN STATE
WE ARE – PENN STATE

Seriously, that’s where we’re going. Penn State.

You can learn more about Penn State and their Supply Chain program here, here and here.