They warned us about this. Some people just don’t listen.
In one of the career workshops we had during orientation I clearly recall the strict instruction that we are to watch how much we drink when recruiters are around and no matter what you do – DON’T TALK TO RECRUITERS IF YOU’VE HAD TOO MUCH. Don’t get the wrong idea – people here don’t need to drink to get ready for an interview. This is in reference to the socializing events that are set up – dinners, bowling, tailgating, etc – either by corporate recruiters or by the business school when the recruiters are here. I didn’t pay much more attention than that because I don’t drink – but I understand now why this needed to be said.
The tailgate before Saturday’s game was sponsored by Dell who happens to be one of the biggest recruiters on campus. It is the target company for many and a lot of students showed up to the tailgate to talk to these recruiters and/or drink a bunch of free alcohol. Anyways, I walked up to introduce myself to the main recruiter there and just before I got up to him, someone else introduced himself to the recruiter. I don’t know the guy too well because he is a 2nd year and I don’t know his name so I’ll just call him ‘Stupid’.
After a brief ‘Hi, my name is ____”, this is what Stupid had to say. I’m paraphrasing here because in his drunken stupor he went on for a while and used a whole bunch of profanity that I won’t repeat here.
“Dude, I’m probably going to forget you but don’t be upset at me. I’m on this experimental medication that’s really screwing with my mind and the doctors just can’t get the right dosage for me. I’ve been on it for a while and my GPA has really started slide for it – I’m down to like a 2.57 which really stinks and I want to get it higher, but my brain just doesn’t work. I just can’t remember anything. That’s why I’m telling you now that I’m not going to remember you. Like, I’ll go to party on a Saturday and meet somebody and then I’ll be hanging out with my friends a few days later and see the person and not remember them at all and my friends are like, ‘Dude, you are such a jerk! How can you not remember this person?’ And it’s not like I’m trying to forget them, my brain is just really messed up because of this medication.”
After about 3-4 minutes the recruiter, out of sympathy, I think, stopped Stupid from speaking and said to him, “Buddy, you really need to work what you tell people like me. We just met a couple of minutes ago and all I know about you is that your GPA stinks, you’re not going to remember anything about me, and all of your friends think you’re a jerk.”
I had to bite my tongue, no kidding, while Stupid stood there processing what he’d just been told. He tried to talk his way out of what he had just said – but c’mon, is it really possible?
Now I know what some of you are thinking. Sammie, if you had of gone to BYU you wouldn’t be having to deal with people like this. My response? All the more reason to be glad I’m at Penn State. I like having people like Stupid talking to recruiters right before I do. I can only imagine how good it makes me look.
OK, time for the Statistics Review Session.